Today Engelbert is humping a Swanson Salisbury Steak TV dinner. It’s both creamy and satisfying without leaving one too stuffed for a post-dinner hump. Engelbert is debating between a bowl of Bird’s Custard and a rolled up copy of TV Quik from 1992 he found behind the sofa.
The internet called, Engelbert answered. When asked to rate the Bieber, Mr Humperdinck placed him somewhere above the Honey Badger (scratchy) but definitely not as fulfilling as a liaison with a Victoria Sponge.
Professionally licensed veterinary practitioners are always on hand to check animals for signs of distress during Engelbert’s performances. Contact climaxes are a common side effect, as exhibited in this photograph.